The Women of Nigeria: Problems, Panacea, and Prospects

Mrs Festus is very nervous. Pregnant with her 6th child, she’s about to find out the sex of her baby and she’s seriously hoping it’s a boy. All 5 of her children are girls and if this is another girl, her marriage is over. She never planned to have these many children but for pressure from her husband, his family and even some of hers, who are always chanting the male child song.

When the cry of a newly-born Nigerian female child fills the air, it arouses a mixture of different emotions. Sometimes it is that of joy and excitement, sometimes, that of indifference, sometimes, that of pain and regret and some other times, a combination of all. You would wonder why such a thing of Joy as bringing a beautiful, new creation into the world would bring about pain and regret to anyone. Wonder no more, blame it on the Nigerian belief system which has impressed it on the minds of men and women alike that the girl child is less valuable than her male counterparts. This belief has so established its roots that even some mothers become sad when they give birth to female children. What a pitiful situation!

As the girl child grows, she is made to understand and accept that she is meant to be in the kitchen doing all the cooking and all necessary house chores. She is also made to understand she is inferior to the boy child or can never speak up against a man. She will be told many times that the ‘home/kitchen’ is her sole responsibility and nothing more.  In some cases, she will be told she needs no formal education and has no voice in decision making.  All these words, succeeds in killing her self-esteem. The consequence of this is that, she goes through her life with the wrong notion that she can’t dream big, she is subject to her male counterpart and would be inferior to him in every way. When she becomes a victim of sexual assault, she keeps quiet. Who is she to speak up against her male abuser? Who will even believe her?

According to a survey by the National Population Commission, only 5.2% of girls who are victims of sexual abuse actually seek help even though 15.6% of the girls who are victims of sexual abuse know where they can get help.[1] You will recall the pathetic story of Ese Oruru, a 13-year-old girl who was kidnapped, abducted, raped, and married off without her parent’s knowledge or consent. By the time Ese was found, she was already five months pregnant with her kidnapper’s child. You would agree with me that the deed was already done.  According to UNICEF’s State of The World’s Children 2016, 43% of girls in Nigeria are married off before they clock 18, and 17% of girls are married off before they turn 15. The average girl child, however, survives through all these and becomes a woman with a variety of experiences, both good and bad, which immensely contributes to her unique strength. You would think that now she is a woman, her troubles are over. The reverse is the case.

One of the major problems Nigerian women face is violence. Violence against women is a predominant and rampant issue in Nigeria. The term “violence against women” is encompassing. Most people restrict its usage to physical violence, but that is only one of the forms of violence against women. There is mental violence, and also emotional violence.

• Physical Violence Against Women

A lot of women experience violence from their male counterparts both in their marriages and outside their marital homes. The weaker vessel, they call her. Based on this, irresponsible and wrongly brought up men see her as a punching bag, and an object of abuse. Remember, she can’t speak up. She has to be kept in submission even if she is constantly abused because she is inferior. Physical violence has led many wives, mothers, and sisters to their early grave, some incidents made known to the public, most times, some are not known to the public. You will recall the recent tragic and pitiful death of the 29-year-old wife of a naval officer who was allegedly beaten to death by the husband. Reports from close sources reveal that she had earlier been a victim of domestic violence, but she kept quiet until it allegedly led to her death.

A lot of women have been victims of attempted rape and rape. How many of these victims speak up? The stigma associated with rape victims, the rather slow Nigerian trial system coupled with inadequate stringent laws to tackle rape cases have also contributed to the refusal of victims to speak up. Most women suffer in silence.

Everywhere around the World, women speak the same language-silence!” 

-Anonymous.

• Mental Violence Against Women

Violence can be defined as any action intended to cause destruction, pain, or suffering. In other words, violence is not restricted to a physical use of force against someone else. Mental violence against women involves the use of hurtful words or attitude to cause psychological pain and suffering to a woman. A lot of times, people prefer to be physically abused than mentally abused. A mentally abused woman is made to believe all sorts, some of which may be that she is worthless, she is a Nobody, and that she is lucky to be married to the abuser. Mental violence may lead to extreme depression, and the woman may get to the point that she commits suicide. Mental violence has more far-reaching consequences than physical violence because it is the mind of the woman that is being abused.

• Emotional Violence Against Women

Women are uniquely created to be more emotional than men. This is not a weakness; it is a strength. It makes the woman more compassionate than the man. Emotional violence involves the manipulation of the emotions of a woman to cause pain and suffering to her. It will surprise you to know that a lot of women out there on the streets suffering from mental illness developed this as a result of emotional violence. A lot of people, women alike, discountenance this form of violence but the truth is that it can be as fatal as the other forms of violence against women.                                          

PANACEA

First and foremost, to tackle the problem of violence against women, all women must be educated. Formal education is very important but even more important is an education on the rights, worth, and peculiarities of women. She has to get rid of that belief that she has to be some steps behind her male counterparts; know that she has a voice, that she is not weaker but unique; and most importantly, be taught to speak up. The major reason why violence against women is on the rise is that the victims keep quiet and refuse to expose the abusers. The woman needs to know it is not her fault that she is being violated, and there are institutions put in place to hear her out, because she has the power to stop this cycle of violence against women in Nigeria. Programmes, seminars, and other forms of awareness should be put in place to catch the girls young. Individuals and Non-governmental organizations also have roles to play; everything should not be left to the government; this is an issue that cuts across all. The next victim could be your daughter, your sister or even your mother; you wouldn’t know.

Another very important remedy to violence against women in Nigeria is women empowerment. This has to come after the women have been earlier educated. Most cases of violence against women thrive because the women are solely dependent on their abusers. These women endure the abuse because they do not see how they will survive if they speak up against their husband or leave their marital home. If women are constantly empowered, coupled with the education they would have earlier gotten, the rate of violence against women will reduce drastically if not be totally eradicated. The Federal government, State government, Local government, NGOs, and well-meaning individuals can play a huge role in women empowerment in Nigeria.

PROSPECTS

Violence against women has become a cankerworm that has eaten deep into Nigeria and is seen as a pandemic because of its rampancy. It is, therefore, not surprising that the Nigerian government and some NGOs have taken it up as a serious issue. The Violence against Persons (Prohibition) Act, 2015 was signed into law on the 25th of May 2015. This acts as a protection for women against violence if the incidents are reported. Victims and survivors of such violence will also get medical, psychological, legal, and social assistance.

Other NGOs that can assist victims of violence are Women At Risk International Foundation (WARIF), Project Alert on Violence against Women, Women Arise for Change Initiative – (Women Arise), Women’s Right and Health Projects (WRAHP). It can be envisaged that more efforts will be put in place in the nearest future to ensure that this pandemic will be put at bay. It is, however, pertinent that we realize that we all have a role to play in ensuring that every woman stands up against violence in Nigeria.

This article was written and contributed by Adeyemi Asaba, a social entrepreneur and development expert based in Canada.